Why Do I Homeschool?

People are constantly asking me why I homeschool. There are so many reasons that I never know which one to give. So here is a list of the reasons why I homeschool, or the benefits I've seen that come from homeschooling....

More family time. Hopefully with more time together we will have better relationships with our kids and they will have better relationships with their siblings. Sure there is plenty of fighting going on, but they have to work through it and in the long run I'm sure they'll be better for it.

I want to raise my kids, I don't want their peers raising them. By 3rd grade, kids get 80% of their influence from their peers and 20% from their parents (this came from a 3rd grade public school teacher manual in SD County). I don't like that statistic and I'd rather be the one influencing my children, not their peer group or even their teachers. Because they're surrounded by their peers less, I feel like their personalities stay sweet and innocent longer- they don't come home from school with a bad attitude or new swear words in their vocabulary. They also have less chances of being exposed to drugs, pornography, etc.

Government controlled education. I have my children's future in mind more than the government does. I don't want my children's education chosen and directed by the government. They don't know my children individually, they aren't trying to be guided by God, and perhaps they are trying to advance some agenda that I don't agree with. There are certain subjects that I would rather educate my children on and leave the government out of. Some of the most recent political issues hitting the schools as early as 2nd grade are: same-sex marriage, sex ed, transgender bathroom laws, and the mandatory vaccine law. Not to mention the many changes that happen in the public school curriculum (Common Core is the most recent). Having a free public education available to all is absolutely wonderful. But having an education directed by parents and God is even better.

Religion in the school. Our founding fathers were religious. I believe God had a hand in the founding of this country. Religion used to be a part of public schools. And the opposite is now true. My children's spiritual education is the most important part of our school day and I am not willing to give that up.  The short life we live here isn't the end of our existence, and the education we receive should reflect that knowledge by being not just temporal, but spiritual also.

Teachers. Sometimes you have a fabulous teacher, other times you don't. I'm not saying I'm a fabulous teacher, but I have the desire and the flexibility to change how I teach and what we're studying if it's not working for my kids. Plus hopefully by the end of our homeschooling years my relationship with each child will be stronger because I was the one spending time with them and helping them progress.

Student:Teacher ratio. 4:1 is a little bit better than 30:1. I know from my own experience in public schools. When I was in third grade I was overlooked and never memorized my math facts. My fourth grade teacher figured it out and what did it take for me to learn them? My dad, not the teacher, spending one on one time with me in the evenings until I learned them.

No middle man between the kids and the parents. I know if my kids understand what they're learning. I know if they know their times tables. I know if we need to slow down or speed up the curriculum. I don't have to meet with their teacher to find this out.

Ability to tailor the curriculum and teaching methods to each child. My seven year old son loves math. He's catching up to my nine year old daughter. My nine year old daughter loves art and music. In piano she's catching up to my eleven year old son. And my eleven year old son loves literature, so he gets plenty of time to spend on that. I don't have to wait for the entire class to progress in order for my children to. We go at their speed. If they don't understand a topic, we spend the extra time on it until they do. And if they need an entirely different approach, I find one. (Art in math? Yes, that's happening here).

"Sports" every day. If I didn't see my kids all day, I wouldn't want them to do extra curricular activities every day- maybe one per kid per season. But we are together all day and so I make sure each kid has an activity every day. They get their energy out, they get to be with friends, I get time to work out.

No homework!! I think fitting homework into the evening would be the worst thing ever. By that time none of us want to be productive. We want to play and relax. And so we do.

Not driving around in school traffic. I had to do this once when I was babysitting and I hated it. I love not rushing around in the morning getting ready for school. I also love not having to be at two or three different schools at the same time to drop off and pick up kids. I'm sure carpooling helps, but staying home helps too. 

Meal time together. Not just dinner time (which doesn't always happen because of sports), but breakfast and lunch too. We love it. Especially because the kids are usually the ones making breakfast and lunch.

Kids learning what it takes to run a household. My brother (jokingly) used to ask my mom what she did all day while we were in school. My kids see what I do. And if I'm busy and stressed out trying to make a meal for someone plus do the laundry plus school, they know how to help. They know how to cook, do laundry, clean, take care of the pets, garden, etc. I love how helpful they are when they need to be. I love that they already know how to do these household chores. And I love how independent they are becoming because of it.

Not having to follow someone else's schedule. I can take my kids to Disneyland during the middle of the week and not get in trouble from our school. I can start school at 8am or at 10am or at 1pm if I feel like it. We don't have to wait for school holidays or the summer to go on trips. If there's an event happening on a Tuesday, we can make Tuesday our field trip day and do school the other days instead.
7/2019 Update: This past winter was the first time we fully took advantage of vacationing during the school year.  We've done trips here and there. But this time we took six mid-week ski trips to Big Bear. Each time from a Wednesday to a Friday. These trips have been one of the best things we've done for our family. So much family time together. So much fun on the slopes learning how to ski together. Board games, hot tubbing. School if we need to. We will be doing this again next year. This perk has always been one of our favorites, but now even more so.

Field trip day. Going on field trips and doing hands-on learning has always been a goal for our homeschool. I love that our field trips count as a school day and we don't have to cram other schoolwork into that busy day. I also love that we don't have to fit field trips into our Saturdays, because our Saturdays are often filled up with sports, house projects, or relaxing. 

Better use of time. Public school is seven hours. How much of that time is spent disciplining, lining up, and sitting around bored? Our school time takes three hours. They have extra time to pursue their own interests, play with their siblings, learn relevant household duties, etc. 

Kids keep their individuality. Homeschool kids are not afraid to be different, dress differently, or break the mold. Many public school kids worry about fitting in, wearing the right clothes, not standing out. Although free public education is a blessing, some schools seem to be focused on a conformist, conveyor belt type of education that prepares kids for a certain type of career. We will hopefully be searching for our vocations (what God would have us do) instead.

We don't have to! Public schools didn't always exist. They started as a social experiment during the industrial revolution so there was a place for kids to go while both parents went to work. I didn't know this until I was an adult, and knowing it helped me realize that we have freedom in choosing our children's education. 

Kids get to learn what I'm passionate about. One of my passions is classic literature. In our seven years of homeschooling we've always been learning and reading from classics. But I recently gave ourselves more literature time than we've had in the past, and I got rid of stuff I don't love. Now I love our homeschool day so much more, and if mom is happy, everyone is happy. 

I enjoy homeschooling and feel it is a purposeful, rewarding use of my time. I get to continue learning. Some of the things I'm teaching my kids I never learned in my public school education. I also continue to learn about teaching, parenting, and about different subjects by going to homeschool conferences or taking online courses. Plus, I enjoy spending time with my kids and I admire the people they're turning into and the relationships we're building. I never want to regret not having spent enough time or attention on them while they were "at home", and homeschooling will take care of that.

The one con that I've been dealing with the entire time I've been homeschooling is having enough time to get my stuff done. Sometimes I get stressed out by my to-do list. My husband reminds me that I don't have any deadlines. This year I've started waking up early to try to get stuff done before school, and it's been helping quite a bit. I also had to realize that some things just won't get done until my kids are out of the house, and I have to be ok with that. I took projects off my to-do list that aren't absolutely necessary and put them in a separate to-do list called "things to do if I ever have extra time". This helped me a lot because it made my real to-do list shorter and manageable. And if I ever do get done with my real to-do list (which actually does happen now), I'm quite giddy to either relax, spend time on myself, or get around to one of those other projects.

How to Begin Homeschooling

This post is for my fellow North San Diegan friends who are thinking about homeschooling and don't know where to start. Some of it is applicable only to our area. Most of it is applicable to everyone.


FIRST: pick a charter school (or decide to do it privately).  We have used:

Coastal Academy - six years and had a great experience with them. They have a campus in Oceanside, Vista, and Escondido (it's called Classical Academy in Vista and Escondido). Many of the people who work there homeschooled their own kids. They have so many different enrollment options: you can send your kids to school twice a week, once a week, or zero times a week The twice a week option "requires" you to use the school's curriculum, so I don't recommend that option because using your own curriculum and schedule is one of the best parts about homeschooling. If you use your own curriculum the school provides you with $500 per child for non-religious curriculum. If you don't send your kids to school at all, they provide you with money for extra-curricular activities. You have access to all their clubs, tutors, online resources, etc. 
However, one draw back about Coastal Academy is- if your kids aren't fully vaccinated, they can not participate in the classes. You could still enroll them and homeschool them all five days and you'll get that money for curriculum and extra curricular activities, but there are so many other charter schools that offer the same thing that it might be better to find a different one to use that is closer to you or gives you more money.

San Diego Neighborhood Homeschools - two years and loved it. Thought about using Inspire Charter because they give more money, but SDNH offers two things that I feel are more important than the money: help navigating community college for high school, and a network of families doing the same thing as us that live near us.

Inspire Charter School - one year and loved it. We switched from SDNH because our education specialist did. They provide a lot more money and the same flexibility and freedom.

Homeschooling Privately - Because of the order the California Governor just signed, this year Charter Schools will only receive the amount of money that they were receiving as of February 2019 (and actually less than that because of the budget cuts). That means that in order to take in any new students for the 2020 school year, charter schools must give less money to all their previous students. Some of them might do this, others might not. Either way, all the charters I know of have a very long waitlist and it's not looking good for new families to become enrolled at them. So, homeschooling privately might be the only option available to you at this time. I have never homeschooled privately, but I know many people that have. You have to submit a private school affidavit through the state. You don't get any government funding. You have to keep meticulous records of attendance and reading/pe logs and have samples on hand in case you get audited, but you also have all the freedom in the world as far as schedules and curriculum. Becoming a private homeschool appeals to me because I love the idea of not answering to anyone, not having to meet with teachers, not turning in samples... But for now, I'm satisfied with Inspire Charter and won't be pursuing this option. However, if the government takes any more control of charter schools, I would definitely consider the private route.

SECOND: pick your own curriculum. That means: don't use the school's curriculum! Once you use their curriculum you have someone to answer to,  task requirements and deadlines. You can't tailor lessons to your kids and you might leave out the stuff you or your kids love in order to complete the schools' assignments. If you want to have a horrible time homeschooling, the way to do it is to use someone else's curriculum and schedule. However, this doesn't mean you have to make up your own stuff. For our first four years we bought an all-inclusive curriculum from Oak Meadow Waldorf School (which I loved and still highly recommend). Every lesson was written out for us and it was very easy to follow along. But because we weren't using Coastal Academy's curriculum, we had so much more flexibility with our pace, schedule, and lessons. So my advice is, no matter what charter school you may enroll in, find and use a curriculum that you love instead of your charter school's curriculum. Unfortunately the only all-inclusive curriculum I have experience with is Oak Meadow, so I can't give any other recommendations for an all-inclusive type. But do a little research, pick one, and then go from there. You'll be able to tweak and change all along the way. Ask around for other recommendations. Your contact at the charter school will have heard of different options from their other students (plus they are probably a seasoned homeschooler themselves). And if you're still overwhelmed, use your school's, but keep in mind you can change it at any time if you don't like it.


THIRD: decide what you want your homeschool experience to "look like". When I first began homeschooling I made a list of everything I wanted my kids to learn or experience and then I looked for a "school" experience that fit my idea. Later, I took Sarah Mackenzie's "Focus & Align" Master Class at http://amongstlovelythings.com/. She offers a worksheet that helps you visualize your ideal homeschool day, find out what your passions are, find out what your kids' passions are, and figure out what you want the kids to remember about their homeschool experience. You don't need the worksheet to do this, but you will need a bit of introspective questioning. So, what do you want your homeschool to look like?  Decide, and then make it happen.


FOURTH: keep it simple. I have talked to many experienced homeschool moms of older kids and they all say: the most important things to teach your kids are reading and math. (And I would a religious aspect to this). So if you're lost, start with reading and math. If that's all you end up getting done, it's ok. If your kids turn out to be good readers, they will read about all the other subjects.  And once you get the hang of it, you can add or change things as needed. If you're worried about gaps in their education, you can supplement with classes at a charter school, co-op, or when they're older the community college. But for the love of homeschooling, start simple. 

FIFTH: do what YOU love. If you're not enjoying the homeschool experience, your kids won't either. If you are passionate about what you're teaching, you will be a better teacher and your kids will get more out of it. And if you've already focused on reading and math, you will have plenty of extra time and the flexibility to cover the topics you want. If you don't know what you're passionate about, fill out the "Focus & Align" worksheet and it will help you discover them. My passions are classic literature, history, music and field trips, so we spend a lot of our time on these and less on subjects like science and grammar. I've also set aside a day each week to go on field trips.

SIXTH: do what your kids love. Or make sure they have enough free time to pursue their own interests. Again, the "Focus & Align" worksheet helped me discover this aspect of homeschooling. And once I realized what my kids loved, I added more of that into our daily assignments (my daughter now does art in her spelling and math assignments and my sons spend more time on math). If you and your kids are doing what you love, homeschooling will be a joy, not a chore.

That's it! Enjoy your kids! Have faith in your ability to teach them and in the inspiration you will receive as you embark on this worthy goal. If you need ideas for curriculum or for getting organized or how to actually "run" the homeschool, check out my other blog posts.


...A note on "socialization". If you're worried about this, don't be. It's a fake worry. Especially with all the homeschooling resources and opportunities available nowadays. Your kids will have plenty of social opportunities: charter school, church groups, sports activities, neighborhood friends, the grocery store, your family...

How Public School Changes Kids' Personalities

Recently we took our kids to a two day gun training.  While my husband and I did our gun course, our kids went to the youth safety program. It was from 8am-5pm with a one hour lunch break.  After our class ended on our second and final day, we got into the car to do the five hour drive home. Our youngest, who is five, chattered nonstop for the next two hours. Nonstop. She chatted to us, she chatted to herself. She nonstop talked for two straight hours. It was pretty unbelievable. Of course she's always been chatty- but never to that extent. Why? I think it's because she had to be quiet and focused for eight hours with no real social outlet. There were other kids there, she could play and talk to them, but she likes to be heard and listened to.

This got me thinking about how she would act if she went to school all day everyday. And how would my other kids' behavior change? Here's my guess...

Son (11)- He would be very influenced by his peers. He wouldn't be as nice to his parents and siblings and would care more what his peers think. He'd probably have a too-good for us personality. Not to mention a change in his slang and vocabulary.

Daughter (10)- She wouldn't get the one on one instruction that she requires for math so would probably be behind in it. She wouldn't have as much time for her arts and crafts, which is a major part of her life and happiness. So she wouldn't have that creative outlet and would probably not be as happy. She would also be more influenced by her peers with a changed attitude and all the other drama that goes along with pre-teen girls.

Son (7)- He would be behind in reading and so incredibly bored in math. He would be riled up by the other kids and might have some discipline problems. He wouldn't have an outlet for his sensitive nature all day. He'd probably like some aspects of it, he'd love all the sports, recess, etc. But he'd either be ultra quiet or he'd get in trouble. He is so wiggly and has a hard time sitting still- so that would be very hard for him.

Daughter (5)- She would have a social outlet with all the peers. But she wouldn't have someone to listen to her all day and would be a chatterbox when she got home. She'd probably do well in all her subjects. Her teachers would love her. And she'd either be a good influence on her peers because of her strong personality, or she'd get influenced by them in the other direction. She'd probably have some girl drama/quarrels.

Of course, these are all hypothetical scenarios. But from my observance of their personalities and how they act all day, during school, and when they've been gone all day, I think they're pretty good guesses. Maybe all children who go to school full time have had some personality change because of their circumstances. I'm glad mine haven't. And that I get to cater to their personalities and their individual needs.

Farewell Coastal - Hello art, science & more field trips

Over the past months I have been mulling over the idea of leaving the charter school we use (Coastal Academy) and doing that extra day on our own. (My kids have been going to school once a week and doing art, science & computer there). I've been very happy with Coastal, but I had a feeling the vaccine law was going to force our hand eventually, and the time has come. We vaccinate our kids- but we do it according to our timeline & schedule with the help of our doctor's expertise. I could actually send two of my kids to Coastal, but not the other two. And why would I do that? Everything is all or nothing for me. ;)

So what does this mean? A few changes:

• Monday will no longer be our field trip day- Friday will be. Yay! It's so much better having a reward at the end of the week. 

• We will (probably) be doing our regular school days Monday, Tuesday & Wednesday. Get it done and out of the way.

• Biggest change- we will be doing art, science & computer at home. I'll donate a day for that (probably Thursday?). I already have ideas mulling around in my head... Art- I studied art history in college, and my kids have taken a class at Coastal that I've loved and will probably try to "copy". It's called Meet the Masters. They study a famous artist one week and the next week they make artwork in his/her style. And the best part of about it is: I can choose artists that go along with the time period we're studying in history! I'm pretty excited about this and can't wait for this school year to end so I can start implementing this art program. In addition to this we'll continue going to art museums for our field trips. I'm also considering putting them in an art class here or there so they can learn art types that I don't know (glass blowing, anyone?) Science- we have a gazillion science kits that I've purchased through the school and haven't really used. So we'll probably go through those first. We'll also go on science/nature field trips- explore the great outdoors, science museums, national parks, plus there are so many great documentaries we can watch. Computer- they do a computer job every day (typing, Rosetta Stone, Lexia or Khan). But on this extra-curricular day I'll teach them something different like how to use word, spreadsheets, drive, and especially coding. I'm not sure how much we'll really do here, but if I miss important stuff they'll be able to take computer classes in college (when they're 14) and can catch up then. Obviously technology has never been one of my main goals. 

• Reaching out to other homeschool families. It would be fun to have friends on our field trips. Or maybe have someone else do science and I do art. (Although that might be more stressful than fun). Because we're leaving behind a network of homeschool families and teachers and friends, I feel like we need to at least attempt to connect with other homeschool families. We shall see what unfolds. Maybe if every week is too much we could do every other week or once a month. 

• No free day for myself. I've come to rely heavily upon the day I have at home with my kids at school. I use it to prep for school and get caught up on my to-do list. So what am I going to do? I need to be more disciplined about getting to bed on time. If I do get to bed on time, I can wake up on time (6ish) and have a couple hours every morning to get my stuff done. (Plus some time in the afternoon). With this time, I won't miss that extra day and everything will work smoothly. 

Wish me luck!